The Onion, New York, NY
As the lines blur even more between real news and satire, “America’s Finest News Source”, The Onion still sits atop the heap of today’s satirical news and storytelling organizations.
Its editorial voice is widely known for its humorous and thought-provoking parodies of news coverage.
In pre-9/11 New York, the Onion was distributed all over Manhattan as a physical newspaper and online as one of the earliest successful blogs. At that time I accepted a Headline Writer internship. I was part of a team that met with the Story Writing team to pitch our headline concepts. The Story Writing team selected their favorite headlines from the interns and created the zany yet deadpan stories The Onion is known to provide its fans.
Below Are 10 Accepted Headlines
I Wrote for the Story Team
About the Onion (as described on its website)
The Onion is the world’s leading news publication, offering highly acclaimed, universally revered coverage of breaking national, international, and local news events. Rising from its humble beginnings as a print newspaper in 1756, The Onion now enjoys a daily readership of 4.3 trillion and has grown into the single most powerful and influential organization in human history.
In addition to maintaining a towering standard of excellence to which the rest of the industry aspires, The Onion supports more than 350,000 full- and part-time journalism jobs in its numerous news bureaus and manual labor camps stationed around the world, and members of its editorial board have served with distinction in an advisory capacity for such nations as China, Syria, Somalia, and the former Soviet Union. On top of its journalistic pursuits, The Onion also owns and operates the majority of the world’s transoceanic shipping lanes, stands on the nation’s leading edge on matters of deforestation and strip mining, and proudly conducts tests on millions of animals daily.
The Onion is now available exclusively online without charge in order to take advantage of various charity tax benefits.
Visit the Onion →
My Frequently-Used Skills with the Onion
Copywriting, Satirical Writing, Humor Writing, Scriptwriting, Defining Characters, Creating Parodies, Collaborating with Writing Teams, Fact-checking, Researching News, and Historical Events